So many things have happened over the last year, it's hard to sort it out into one post.
Today was an emotional day for me (already and it's not even 2pm!), and I really, really feel the need to vent. I have no one to vent to!!! My husband is working, my friends don't need to hear what I have to say (long story, but it would fuel the fire of negative feelings/views they already have). . .so, guess what? Cyberspace becomes my tool to vent. Don't you feel blessed?
I have been lied to my whole "religionity" life. I was told that the person who stands in front of the congregation and preaches God's Word is right. Or at least mostly right. I am to respect them and not go against the tide. Well God gave me a brain too, and if I see something in scripture that doesn't line up with what the "pastor" said, then I say something. And I have. And I left.
Which brings me to today. As I sat in a local assembly of believers (can't call it a church because that really isn't what it is.. long story, for another post), I found myself getting upset. What was being said WASN'T true. Couldn't be. What was being said was that God is not interested in the details of my life.
This has been stated before by the "teacher", but this time it was stated SEVERAL times in one "message".
I said something when they were done with the Bible Study, and they pointed to the Bible and basically said I had no proof. I have no biblical proof that God cares about the details of my life.
Knowing this fact, I still got angry. And I'm still angry. "LIAR!" is what I want to scream. But I have no biblical proof.
All the verses that talk about how He has written names in His hand and covered with His wings is for Israel. Not me (something I'm learning.. rightly dividing scripture).
It makes me upset. I guess it makes me upset because I want to trust someone whole-heartily and I cannot with this teacher.
It's impossible to trust EVERYTHING someone says, just because they say it with a Bible in their hands. Isn't that why God gave us all the Bible? Gave us all brains? Gave us all reasoning?
It still makes me mad, but I'm getting over it.. see, I feel better already!
Sunday, October 16, 2011
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